Waste Away
by mewling
Summary: Sometimes you lose. Sasuke, Naruto and Sakura lose all they ever had, ever wanted. Kakashi has already lost. [Team Seven, major angst, character deaths]


series**naruto**  
title**waste·away**  
rated**K**  
warnings**angst**,**possible·shounenai**  
by**mewling**

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**-**

**Waste Away**

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I. Sasuke

He comes across the body at three a.m.

The corpse is bubbled, rotting. The smell is thick and pungent and it's nauseating. He doesn't know how long he stands there, just watching, his expression neutral.

It hasn't degraded to the extent that the features aren't recognisable, but the flesh is puckered and pocked like it's been victim to some nasty disease. Yet the thick slashes –three of them- that score the body refute that. The clothes that the man once wore are in slightly better condition; bloodied and muddied, but their bold design is still visible.

It doesn't matter how much physical resemblance can be found. Sasuke could recognise Itachi's body even if it was just a skeleton.

So he stands there, his hopes, dreams and vengeance lying useless at his feet. The person whom he hated so much no longer exists. Sasuke can't hate someone who doesn't exist. Like this, Itachi is just pathetic. He tells himself that it's better he's dead, regardless. Doesn't really feel that way.

The future he had imagined seems to fall off, redundant. Hatred and anger is still coiled up inside him, with no place to go and no way to release. He's just a man with no purpose, in the middle of nowhere, who's wasted his life.

He wonders if it would have felt differently if he himself had killed Itachi. It's not like he'll ever know.

But he suspects it wouldn't have.

·

II. Naruto

It's ten in the morning when Naruto gets the news.

He doesn't cry when he's told, through the look on Sakura's face as she informs him reveals she thought he would. He knows, deep down, that Shikamaru will make an excellent Hokage.

But when he doesn't turn up to the celebration party, his friends understand and none hold it against him.

He's no longer twelve, and he's realised that he can't force people to respect him. No matter how good he becomes, no matter how nice and how many friends he has in high places, it can't change the fact that the world is full of bigots and idiots. People only see what they want to. Naruto can change himself, but he can't change others.

Neji would rub his back and whisper in his ear '_next time, next time'_, and Gaara would use himself as an example to try to cheer him up. It wouldn't work, and Naruto doesn't want to deal with their infatuation when he's down. He'll sit and watch the sunset from the Hokage monument until it's dark and the mosquitoes dive him nuts. Then he'll go eat so much ramen he can't help but be happier.

Naruto feels a little bit like he did when he watched Kakashi bring in Sasuke's body, broken and smashed. They found Itachi's skeleton a week later, but they didn't bury them together. Sasuke's grave is just outside of town, a place reserved for traitors.

Naruto visits it sometimes when no one's looking.

·

III. Sakura

Sakura holds Naruto's funeral at dawn.

There's no one there Sakura doesn't herself know intimately. She didn't think there would be anyone else.

They leave cups of ramen by the marker instead of flowers, but it's not as funny or touching as it should be. It was a joke Naruto had had when he was alive, and it was one of those things Sakura didn't understand about Naruto. She remembers, every year asking him what he wanted for his birthday. It was always instant ramen, but she'd never gotten it for him (who would give something so cheap?).

He dies protecting them, but he's been buried beside Sasuke as a traitor. None of them could change this. In a way, Sakura supposes it's better. At least this way, less people will spit on it. Not being a demon doesn't stop you from being demonised.

There are people missing from the group - Neji, Gaara and Konohamaru, among others- who are probably dealing with their grief in their own way. She'll probably see them in the next week. Like when Sasuke had been returned to the earth, she'll stay here and sleep with her boys until she can deal with the loneliness.

Kakashi reaches to hold her hand, and Sakura manages a weak smile of gratitude. Sometimes she wonders what would have happened if Sasuke had come back alive. She looses herself in her fantasies for hours at a time. Kakashi seems to understand, although he doesn't say anything.

It is nightfall by the time everyone leaves. Sakura tugs the sleeping bag tighter around her, and tries to force the stars to look just like stars, rather than constellations with myths and nautical information attached.

·

IV. Kakashi

The sun is setting at six o'clock, when he visits them.

Kakashi rarely visits the living anymore. It's been a while, and the years stretch between him and his memories. He can't remember them quite as well anymore.

It's been almost a year since he retired. It's been almost a year since Sakura died.

She wasn't buried where she deserved to be, she was buried where she asked to be, beside her team mates. Kakashi doesn't think any of them are buried where they deserved to be. It didn't stop him requesting to be buried with them, too.

Their graves are simple rock markers, with no inscription, like all the other tombs out here. If Hinata hadn't planted a dandelion next to Naruto's, he wouldn't know where they were at all. Despite their services, the marker which holds the names of the heroes of Konoha does not hold theirs. In a couple of generations, no one will remember any of them.

Kakashi wishes he could change that; it doesn't matter to him, but it mattered to Naruto. He wishes he could have found Sasuke when he was still alive, not an hour later. He wishes he could've let them all be happy. He wanted to raise a team that wouldn't end up like his; and ordinary team, with ordinary goals.

It's too dark to see anymore. His left eye tingles, and Kakashi suspects it's with tears.

He's the only one left.

Again.

·

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A/N: … characters are a little off…

N.B: It needn't be shounen-ai (in Naruto's section) unless you reed it like that. Infatuation  
can just mean a sort of frivolous obsession.


End file.
